A Tale Form the [Censored]

Once upon a time, there was the [censored], a strange and Oriental land. The [censored]’s people believed in [censored] a spirit of politeness and respect. Millions of years ago, a huge antimatter meteor struck Shanghai, destroying all life on Earth except for one prophet of [censored]. This prophet saw the future with his mind eye and warned society at large by constructing many statues around the globe to act as warning beacons against any potential alien attacks in the future. The people were impressed by their vast quantities but soon began to worship the statues as physical manifestations of [censored] — or at least, so they thought. A man named [censored] looked upon these people and knew what they were doing was wrong. So, he single-handedly set out to find each statue in order to dismantle them. This would deprive the local populace of their favorite activity and force them to promote politeness and respect for one another. Having gathered all the necessary equipment for this journey, about 5 gallons worth of canned food, some rice balls, chopsticks, chopsticks chopsticks, spices he received from donations made entirely of pocket change (who needs Bitcoin?), 35000 paper cranes for good luck, never-ending cans of spray paint he stole from his local community center (God have mercy on their souls), etc., he headed off on his adventure... But was it really? *BYE* *CUTOFF LOSS OF CONNECTION TO OUTER SPACE! NEVER EXPECTED THAT COSTUME WOULD ACTUALLY WORK*.