My Very First Crypto Profit

A bitcoin bro by the name of Jurgen lived in a world where fiat (or “cheese curds”) was used as currency. As he mined more and more digital currency, he felt an urge to trade. He searched high and low for someone who would help him convert his BTC into cheese curds, but no one seemed to be interested. The few vendors that accepted BTC as payment only offered banana coins as change, which he found out were quite useless when trying to buy anything besides bananas. Finally, he sought out professional help in Turkey’s underground economy — however, there were no Bitcoin brokers whatsoever. In his desperation, he decided to sell all the cheese curd money he had been hoarding during the previous year on October 16th, 2010, and bet it all on Bitcoin being worth more than 1000 USD by December 31st, 2010. Regardless, it’s said that luck favors the bold — and just like that, on April 27th, 2013 after paying an impossibly cheap “5” USD for a pizza from Papa John’s following a major crash in price leading up to 2013 Black Friday due to MtGox getting shut down on April 18th of the same year because some Russian idiot bought about 23 000 bitcoins for lunch at August 9th 2012 for 10 000 bitcoins at $12 apiece adding up to nothing but trouble, Jurgen sold 5 pizzas from Papa John’s for 5 bitcoins each and quickly flipped them into 25 bitcoins, which he then converted into 165 bitcoins — his first major profit ever in bitcoin.